Sunday, April 30, 2006

hitman goes overboard......everyone stay #?@ calm

It's true...da' hitman is chekked out; AND goin' communin' in da woods. surely y'all remember when dis happened in '93. we eventually found him (shoeless in vermont); though da runnin' man is STILL golne. now then, TSI rolls on---and is in good hands wit' me. j-daddy told me his own-self to tell all thanks for all the friendship, kindness and good wishes over the past several months. I assure you he continues to improve. He took a short-notice leavest of abstentia this morning for parts unknown (north or south or westest), but has promised to keep in close touch with da cellular monstular. I'll be handling his personal e-mail and official slug duties while he continues his recovery. he's promised to return all calls, unless it's mr. clark (whom he will be chasin at RBC & JFK). he's also promised to attend some upcoming u.l.t.r.a. events; possibly even slogging through a few. from key west, mister flatfoot-freddie. p.s. i promise to put sum bedder pics on site :)

Crowder's Mountain (bro. Claude) & VOL-STATE

Congrats to all 22 finishers at Crowder's Mountain this weekend. The Runner's From Hell do things right....and stick together. It was great to see the personalized race report from "Doom" and read about the outstanding job Sam, Eliza, and Ray K did in keeping a great race alive. Report can be seen on Slug-site. Also, checking in this week was The Laz-man himself. Announcing plans for this year's Vol-State. He announces; "just in case someone is looking for something fun to do in july. the last annual VOL-STATE ROAD RACE. july 22, 2006 (10 day limit); 500 km (310 miles) Dorena Landing, MO to Cole City, GA ; divisions for aided runners and solo ; includes distance in missouri, kentucky, and alabama to go with about 295 miles in tennessee. ever wanted to run from missouri to georgia? ever wanted to do ten 50k's in a row? ever wanted to run a race where anyone could win? last year barry crumrine won, in his first ever ultra. if you are interested, contact me. laz (" On the positive side, i do believe that gary is not detouring through frozen head :) Hope each of you are having a fantastic spring running season. sunnin and sandin, flatfoot freddie from key-west (for da' hitman).

Saturday, April 22, 2006

The Great One to Appear at RBC! Autographed pics available.

It's raining in The First State! Hallelujah. We need it so bad. The field for the RBC 50K continues to get more interesting. I sent a very nice note to Mr. John "The Great One" Clark of Sunbury, PA inviting him to come and start this year's field of world-class slugs & sluggettes. In the invite I checked my spelling and grammar, put some scented lilac spray on the official TSI stationary, and sealed it with a kiss. I've always treated Mr. Clark very nicely (I've even continued to not make fun of his dented shiny baldspot) ; and even though I have a million reasons to exsluggunicate him from the Slugs---with, at the top of the list of good reasons being, his physical assault on me at Seashore State Park in which he intentionally pushed me off a 20 foot sand cliff so he could beat me back to the finish line; and his rompings at an official Slug event with Big Bertha from Bethesda in public while impaired ---but NO; i like him soooooooooo much i continue to maintain contact with him. In fact, I've even offered to name him Mayor of the Sunbury Slugs. So what kind of e-mail do I get back---well here it is. Mr. Clark says, "Hitman, you sh#*-head, what do you want now? I'm busy watching girls gone wild infomercials. Hey, by the way have you ever tried any small blue pills?" Then he went on to accuse me of writing mis-information (lying) on the website. Well, of course, this is true. If I really wrote the truth about what has happened at dozens of TSI events over the years, no one would believe it anyway. I only believe it because I was there. His dastardly comments being exposed in public is of no concern to the Great One. Because, he is, well the Great One, the Famous Midnight Overhand Bowler, and per Bertha, even more hard-core than Wrong-way Charlie himself. And that's why Team Slug loves him. So he's promised to be here; even though he didn't show up last September when TSI named a race after him. FOR THE RECORD; if he shows up with a Starter's Shotgun and fires it in the State Park; I (the hitman) told him NOT too. So from the mountains of central Delaware that's the news on this perfect rainy weekend. happy days, john.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

The All-Nighter Speaks....and da' Slugs listen!

Great news Slugs!!!! In order to get my lazy arse out on the trails on a daily basis; i have summoned the one man who can and will get/keep me moving. I am truly committed to completing my fifth (5th) JFK this year. My goal is to finish in 13:59:59 and earn the Crazy Horse Award; though with da' Slugs there en' masse there will be some stiff competition. The All-Nighter, TSI Hall of Fame 1995, has graciously accepted duty as Commander of the Team Slug entry. He along with his bride, and my favorite Sluggette write, " When duty calls, we will be there. Rebecca and I accept this position. What an honor. This is to be Rebecca's year also. She has started her training and I am signing her up for races. We're going to race our way back into JFK shape. We look forward to the TSI 50K in September. Got it on the calendar.....Can't wait. JFK here we come." Slugs, just ignore the sentence or two I edited out. It was just something about John Clark's bald spot. Nothing personal :) Also, got a nice note from Mr. Crisman who popped a s-weet 3:07 at Boston on Monday. If he wasn't a personal friend of Lance Souther's (El Presidente, Sluggette Gone Wild; Ft Walton Beach, FL) and a fine Army man, I'd personnal dis-bar him from the Slug Kingdom. But, he's a great guy; albeit a fast one. I'd like to thank each of you all for the continually supportive e-mails. I've been home nearly a month now, and this retirement thing is driving me crazy. Today and everyday I wish each of you a fulfilling and healthy life. happy days, john

Monday, April 17, 2006

Happy Belated Easter (one day late) :)

All is swell here in the First State. Running weather could not get any better. It has been perfect. We are so fortunate; seeing that most of our friends in California and the mid-West have been struggling with all sorts of impending disaster. Believe me you all are in my thoughts and prayers, and if any need assistance please contact me directly. I try not to watch the news very much; but do enjoy the weather channel; and somedays it's scary. This week I received a running request from Ms. Becky at the University of Delaware. She needs volunteers. She says, "Hi John, Working on my PhD disseration and looking at the effect of asymmetry on injury in long distance runners. I'm looking for some volunteers to come into the lab (one time) to participate. During the experiment I will measure your running style, hip strength, and some structural measurements. None of the tests are painful or tiring. I'm looking for people who consistently run 20 miles a week, are 18-45 years old, and have no current injuries. I'm particularly interested in people who have a history of injuries on one side of their bodies. " If any are able to help her, please contact her at or you may contact me a TSI and i'll put you in touch with her. Again Slugs, friends, etc; happy Easter and I hope each of you are enjoying a healthy Spring running season. happy days, john.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

More Slug Heroes - - - All-Nighter & Catra

Two posts in one week. That's incredible; and unheard of. But, this past weekend something very special happened in North Carolina. And, in the (ultra)marathon reality most of my running budds live in, it's easy to take such physical feats for granted. While there were several Slug finisher's at the Umstead 100-mile run, two of them are my personal heroes. First, Ms. Catra (CA), an incredibly positive and inspirational human being and competitor whose running achievements are so incredible, the non-runner would never understand them. So many days i haven't felt like running i knew Catra was out doing 30 in the mountains of California. So I went out too. Into the hills of Delaware :) You can follow her exploits on her blog. It's linked (Slugs love Catra) on the TSI front page. Another of my heroes I met on September 26, 1993. It's easy to remember the date because I met him and his beautiful bride at the Slug Ultra Oval in Hampton, VA. They came, and finished the Third TSI 50K Birthday Run. James in 5:45 and his bride in 8:19. He is one of the primary reasons Team Slug still exists. He is also President of the Metro Slugs, and was named to the TSI Hall of Fame in 1995. Of course, it's James "All-Nighter" Moore; married to my favorite "Sluggette" Ms. Rebecca. Over the years the military has kept us apart, but we have managed to remain in touch. He also has a long history of incredible ultra achievements including multi-day runs on the C & O Canal. And, he's not only a world-class athlete, but also has world-class kindness and compassion for his fellow human beings. He is an American Original. James, thanx for being you. I really appreciate you and Rebecca, and i will see you at JFK....this year! happy days, john.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Congrats Magic Moose!!!!

Wow! What a great week it's been. Not so much running-wise for me personally, but certainly in my life. On Friday I retired from the U.S. Air Force after 21 years and 18 days. I've loved the military and was honored and privileged to serve, but am very thankful to be out and be a civilian.
First TSI has to congratulate the VHTRC and Chris Scott on their 14th Bull Run Run. Preliminary reports indicate the 281 finishers enjoyed plenty of "mud." I'm sure more will be posted in the upcoming days. Even heartier congratulations have to go out to Michael "The Magic Moose" Talbert of Oklahoma City, OK who completed his 14th consecutive BRR in 10:16:09. The Mooseman was one of the Original Slugs from way-baaaaack; and maybe we can coax a race report out of him. Also, congrats to the Trail Dawgs who represented the First State very well. Also while eating Chinese this week I received the most appropriate Fortune Cookie of my life. It said, "To truly find yourself you should play hide and seek alone." That's the story of most of my trail runs. Friends, I have each one of you in my thoughts and prayers today. happy days, john.