Seneca Creek Greenway Trail Marathon/50K

ALL-SLUGS
Hope all is well with you. had a great time at the race and tried to crazy horse the marathon, but had some stiff competition. It was like racing Eugene "Bring it" or Miguel "last one standing" Gomez. It was a fight, but in the end I just wasn't able to hang on. So I had a beer and some ribs and called it a night. It was a great race, highly recommend it for all. Plus it had some mud and you know how much I love mud!
Pokey.

Friday night I made my way over to Montgomery County Maryland to settle in for my first time running this event. I used to live in this area and would run on parts of this trail sometimes. It was a different time in my life then and I can't believe I was back running form where I used to live, to about where I used to work. 4 years does change a lot of things.

5:35 am comes way too soon and I get my gear on and prepare to drive to the finish area and meet up with Down and Durty Slug, aka Durt, so we can ride the bus to the start together. The temp isn’t too bad, but the wind is fierce. I was glad I had plenty of layers on. We are dropped off to registration and the start line and get our numbers. While in line I her someone Yell “turtle” which is one of my many monikers. It is KC from Kickrunners who recognized me from an incident at JFK involving a certain “knighted” slug and pictures of said slug’s, ahem, cheeks. I then saw the NJ Lawyer clan who made quite a Splash at TSI Fattest Butt who were in great spirits.

Line up for the start came and off we went. D&D slug hung with me for a bit, but true to Wrong Way Charlie’s teachings, I quickly found my way to the back of the pack. I ran with KC for a bit and finally was left to my own slug devices at the back of the pack. I found my slogging pace and quickly found myself oozing through mud and such. The trail was quite pretty and I enjoyed my time on the trail. After a few miles, I started to catch up to some other runners, one being the Lovely Miss C from Colorado, two weeks after her Tokyo Marathon finish. I started to run and chat with her, enjoying these moments that only seems to happen on the trails. Those fun times with new friends who have wonderful tales and great insight.

As we headed over one of the road crossings, we came upon a runner who had an unfortunate run-in with a deer. She was a bit bloodied from the encounter and was talking to a volunteer. I offered my firefighter experience to check her out and suggested she have her shoulder checked out and hand cleaned up at a Local ER. Deer are very powerful and she had a lot of shoulder pain. Once they were getting her on her way, I left out onto the trail, searching for the Lovely Miss C. We made it to the 11 mile marker and I had the most wonderful Girl Scout cookies and refilled my water. I took off a bit ahead of Miss C, but she was not far behind me. There was a time when we came out of the woods and the wind picked up, giving me quite a chill. It slowed me down considerably and Miss C caught up to me. We were making okay time, but as we made our way to the 15 mile marker, we started to hear the trail sweep behind us. I picked the pace up a bit and made it to the 15 mile marker with about 2 minutes to spare.

Miles 14 and 15 are always a low point for in any race for me. I tend to question my sanity and desire for finishing at this point. I have found that some Coca cola and m&ms seem to cure this mental block and I push through. I found both at the 15 mile marker and took off, in hopes of a finish.

I must take the time to note the signs advertising Peeps everywhere. At first I thought maybe someone was hiding peeps in the woods where one could “hunt” and find them. I started to get a little mad at the fact there were no peeps hiding from me. It was when I finally saw a sign with “Peep Show 2 miles” did I realize it was going to be an Aid station with peeps. I was stoked, to say the least. With some Coke already on board, the thought of peeps was energizing. I quickly found my way up the hill next to field, then down towards the peep station. There they were, those mythical beasts of sugary perfection, I gave a pat to the stuffed “Peep” on my way into the station. I called out my number and they said good going Amanda…. It was great to hear someone cheering me on. I was even more excited by the two peeps ,one purple and one green, they handed to me, neatly impaled on a stick. This was no marshmallow fluff on my shoe (long story), but real, slightly stale, peeps on a stick. I was in heaven. I had a Pb&J, two peeps (marshmallow goodness), and some more coke. I filled up my water bottle, sucked down some lava salts and went on my merry way.

I took some time to walk off the peeps and channel my inner slug. Miss C caught up with me (that woman is a POWER walker) and we stayed together for a few. She was told we were about a 10K from the finish. I knew I could make that in the time allotted, so I bid her farewell, since she walked faster than I did and I was running faster than her at that point. I quickly made my way to the last stop, where I had my water bottle topped off and some pretzels. I then told the volunteers I loved them when they told me 3 miles to the finish and I really meant it. I totally did love them. I made my way down to the second big water crossing and managed to only get one “turtle” foot wet. I then made my way up these huge steps that made my quads feel like they were being ripped off and up and up a hill.

About this time I realized just how important all the weight training I have been doing is. All the squats, plyometrics, box jumps, bosu, and wobble board work. I pushed myself up the hills with more speed that I would normally have at this point and when I hit the flats, I was moving fast. I made it off the trail and to the road where I made my way to the finish. Walking up the road on my way to the Finish was none other than the Boyfriend, his Uncle and D&D slug. I tossed my mittens to the Boyfriend with an “I didn’t pee on them” (long story) and D&D slug took off down to the finish with me. He had a good finish in the 50K and got some quality time in for Umstead. I finished the Marathon in 7:47(my last 10K was a 1:20 which is a good trail 10K for me after 25 or so miles), certainly not the faster time in all of history, but it was a great training run for me. Plus, I got to run with an amazing lady for a good portion of the race, which is worth more than any PR in my slug opinion.

Jimmy Buffett for President '08

Team Slug has Officially thrown it's Inconsequential Support behind the Jimmy Buffett for President '08 campaign. This has delayed da'hitman's return to the Eastest Coast, as he is currently in Parrothead Political Training in Key Largo. Upon his return, he will assume a leadership position in Mr.Buffett's 1st State effort. Sending huggs to all da'Slugs, flatfoot freddie...

One Particular Harbour
I know I don't get there often enough
But God knows I surely try
It's a magic kind of medicine
That no doctor could prescribe

But there's this one particular harbour
So far but yet so near
Where I see the days as they fade away
And finally disappear

But now I think about the good times
Down in the Caribbean sunshine
In my younger days I was so bad
Laughin' about all the fun we had

Most mysterious calling harbour
So far but yet so near
I can see the day when my hair's full gray
And I finally disappear

Congrats Mister Crisman :)

Slugs,
Below note from Mark Crisman, who finished his 100th marathon/ultra in Austin last Sunday.
Congrats Mark! It's been a BLAST getting to know you.
Happy Days,
Hitman.

All-

In the grand scheme of things what I'm about to share
with you pales in comparison with what truely is
important in our world today such as the gift of life,
family and friends.

I, like many of you, have relied on my love of running
to deal with the stresses that life challenges each of
us with. I've witnessed absolutely incredible mental
and physical feats by individuals who from at first
glance seem nothing but ordinary but in reality
possess unbelievable inner fortitude, drive and desire
that the common man will never achieve.

Last Sunday, I completed the Austin Marathon which was
my 100th marathon or longer. This was only possible
due in large part to my good fortune to be associated
with most of you. Your encouragement over the years
was the catalyst that enabled me to reach this
personnel goal.

I want to thank my wife Nikki and my daughter Calley
for understanding my sickness (running) and supporting
me even when I can hardly walk and limped around for
days like 90-year man after every run. Of course, it's
understood that I receive no sympathy for my
self-inflected injuries.

Dann, thanks for constantly pushing me past my own
perceived limitations and providing miles of good
conversation and friendship.

Phil and Stacy, thanks for promoting our sport and
giving so much for so little in return and always
having cold Coors readily available at the end of a
brutal run.

Chong-Pin, thanks for exposing me to the Korean
culture and sharing many miles of running. I can
never fully repay you for your hospitality.

Team Slug (da hit man), thanks for making running fun!
I wear the Team Slug truckers hat with pride! I will
return to the Delaware coast one day.

Paul and Tony, thanks for kicking me in the ass when
running just wasn't doing it for me.

Jared, thanks for sharing my 100th and walking up the
damn hill at the 25 mile mark. I look forward to a
flatter, faster Houston course next year.

Thanks to all and look forward to sharing the road and
trail with you soon,

Mark

Congrats to Alisa Springman...

...of Mercersburg, PA; who won the 2007 RBC50K. She has been accepted into the 2008 Badwater Challenge.

Good Luck from all the Slugs.

Full list of entrants at: http://www.badwater.com/2008web/2008roster.html

Crazy Horse Ale being replaced???

Yes, the rumours are true! This is good stuff...with limes...
happy days from key west,
flatfoot freddie

Somebody call the Guv-ner of Florida...

...because when da'hitman and i; end up in the same state, for any amount of tyme, nothing good can happen. it'll be a miracle if i don't up in the brig before the end of the month; especially with runnin' man ratcheting up the rhetoric concerning the resurgence of the boggy bayou stomp. there be alli-gators down here, and da'hitman AND runnin' man don't seem to understand that antagonizing alli-gators by slogging through their swamp is NOT a good idea.

anyway; jimmy buffet's taking the edge off, and 'dem grapefruits looking good, and tasting mighty fine fer breakfast, with a tad of rum soaked in. hope all in slug-land are keeping warm tonight.

keepin' da'hitman outta trouble, flattest foot freddie

Asteroids, and The Planet Earth...

From the AP Wire Services:
The largest asteroid in more than 20-years missed earth early Tuesday
morning.
The asteroid, dubbed TU24, is two-thousand-feet wide and passed 334-thousand
miles from Earth a little after 3 o'clock in the morning. The city-block-sized asteroid
moving at a speed of 6 miles every second has 60 times as much energy as the
largest hydrogen bomb during the cold war. The next one that is expected to
pass as close or closer than TU24 will not occur until 2027 according to
scientists.


Tonight I was out in the cool evening air. It was very dark, and as I slogged along the sky kept drawing my attention. It seemed more expansive tonight, more incredibly, inconceivably huge. Tonight running in the dark, i felt small, and helpless, and lonely. And I thought about this huge rock that just came hurtling by our little planet. And I started thinking about life, and time. You see there is a rock coming, the size of a city block, at six miles a second; that is going to hit our fragile Planet Earth. Life as we know it will change forever. This is a fact. The only question is whether or not we'll be here when it happens.

And so when I get to thinking about these things and looking at the sky, I start to consider actions I've taken in my life, and how I've treated my family and friends. I've made mistakes, and I'm sorry for them. Further, I know that I don't tell them often enough that I care about them, and love them.

So tonight my friends, I want to share how much I appreciate the kindness that each of you have shared with me over so many years. Life, and time is precious. Please, please, take care of yourself, your family and friends. Make sure they know how much you care about them. In the end, nothing else will matter.

Happy Days,
john.

Wise Pokey Say,

" As with anything Team Slug, everything for us is a nonevent and as far as Ranger Rick is Concerned, we were never there."

Booty Rumble; Shake it, but don't Break it???

Okay guys here's what I came up with for the Booty Rumble nonevent in June:

Shake it, But don't Break it, it took 9 months to make it!
TSI presents the 2008 Booty Rumble 25K/50K Saturday June 21st, 2008

Team Slug is proud to offer a nonevent in the Delaware Heat in June. That's Right on June 21st, TSI is going to make history by bringing the Big, the Wide, the Flat, the Teenie, the Tiny, and Even the Broken Hineys to the first state for a Booty Rumble. For those desiring a fast trail run without going the full Ultra distance we offer the 25K and for those desiring a challenge and a crack at owning a world famous black slug shirt we will also have a 50K. Entry is limited to 15 or less. Remember this is a nonevent, Ranger Rick needn't know all the details. Cost is nothing for both 25K or 50K, although is you want a Rumble T-shirt and/or a teamslug shirt you'll need 10 US dollars a piece. Designs for the Rumble T-shirt will be made public sometime in the future, after consultation with Rumpshaker Slug to make sure we accurately capturing shaking it and having a good day. The course used is the same as RBC and Fattest Butt.
--
Pokey Slug...
e-mail threats to...
jtkrizzo@att.net

Congrats to All R.R. finishers!!!

And looking down the list,

2008 Rocky Raccoon Finishers

, I see da'slugs were well represented. Congrats to each of you, there's no doubt that finishing the hundred is an incredible athletic, and emotional, accomplishment. I don't want to go through all the names, as many of the slugs stay undercover (until the beer gets here), and i don't want to miss anyone.

Special congrats must go out to TSI Exec Board member King Slug, who reports,

When I started my last 40 miles I was nauseated. In fact, I was in Oh-No land. I made it 66 miles and was not able to keep anything down. I was a bit panicked but I just said that a 24-hour finish was not going to happen today. I pulled to the side and into the woods where no one could see me. I lay down and took a nap. I guess I slept about 25 min., I got up, and threw up for my 5th time and only had dry heaves from there out. I know this is strange and sick. Imagine being the guy or gal that heard this in the woods late at night. Blahhh Blahhh Blahhhh!

p.s. Perverse, Unsubstantiated Rumours are that The King Slug borrowed Catra's sunglasses in da' middle of da'nite... It's good being King.

Hope all are well in Slug-Land,
happy days from key west,
flattest foot freddie

Permits, Parks, and Ranger Rick.

For the Sluggos without access to the ultralist. Kind of long, but I believe all will appreciate it. Hey, enjoy the Super Bowl; and have some hot wings for me.

This being Superbowl weekend and I've just recovered from a visit to Costco where everyone seemed to be shopping for eats for tomorrow's game and since I've been fascinated in the past here on the list by correspondence having to do with Barkley and park closures, I thought it would be timely to share the following correspondence. I did label it NUC so I suppose not too many people will read it, but it's funny.
Jennifer Aviles
Tucson
The Dam

This is an actual letter sent to a man named Ryan DeVries regarding a pond on his property. It was sent by the Pennsylvania Department of Environmental Quality, State of Pennsylvania. This guy's response is hilarious, but read the State's letter before you get to the response letter.

Dear Mr. DeVries:

It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental Quality that there has been recent unauthorized activity on the above referenced parcel of property. You have been certified as the legal landowner and/or contractor who did the following unauthorized activity: Construction and maintenance of two wood debris dams across the outlet stream of Spring Pond

A permit must be issued prior to the start of this type of activity. A review of the Department's files shows that no permits have been issued. Therefore, the Department has determined that this activity is in violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act 451 of the
Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of the Pennsylvania Compiled Laws, annotated.

The Department has been informed that one or both of the dams partially failed during a recent rain event, causing debris and flooding at downstream locations. We find that dams of this nature are inherently hazardous and cannot be permitted.

The Department t herefore orders you to cease and desist all activities at this location, and to restore the stream to a free-flow condition by removing all wood and brush forming the dams from the stream channel. All restoration work shall be completed no later than January 31, 2006.

Please notify this office when the restoration has been completed so that a follow-up site inspection may be scheduled by our staff. Failure to comply with this request or any further u nauthorized activity on the site may result in this case being referred for elevated enforcement action.. We anticipate and would appreciate your full cooperation in this matter. Please feel free to contact me at this office if you have any questions.

Sincerely,
David L. Price, District Representative and Water Management Division.

Here is the actual response sent back by Mr. DeVries:

Dear Mr. Price,

Your certified letter dated 12/17/02 has been handed to me to respond to.

I am the legal landowner but not the Contractor at 2088 Dagget Lane, Trout Run, Pennsylvania.

A couple of beavers are in the (State unauthorized) process of constructing and maintaining two wood "debris" dams across the outlet stream of my Spring Pond. While I did not pay for, authorize, nor supervise their dam project, I think they would be highly offended that you call their skillful use of natures building materials "debris."

I would like to challenge your department to attempt to emulate their dam project any time and/or any place you choose. I believe I can safely state there is no way you could ever match their dam skills, their dam resourcefulness, their dam ingenuity, their dam persistence, their dam determination and/or their dam work ethic.

These are the beavers/contractors you are seeking. As to your request, I do not think the beavers are aware that they must first fill out a dam permit prior to the start of this type of dam activity.

My first dam question to you is:
(1) Are you trying to discriminate against my Spring Pond Beavers, or
(2) do you require all beavers throughout this State to conform to
said dam request?

If you are not discriminating against these particular beavers, through the Freedom of Information Act, I request completed copies of all those other applicable beaver dam permits that have been issued.

(Perhaps we will see if there really is a dam violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act 451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of the Pennsylvania Compiled Laws, annotated.)

I have several concerns. My first concern is, aren't the beavers entitled to legal representation? The Spring Pond Beavers are financially destitute and are unable to pay for said representation -- so the State will have to provide them with a dam lawyer. The Department's dam concern that either one or both of the dams failed
during a recent rain event, causing flooding, is proof that this is a natural occurrence, which the Department is required to protect. In other words, we should leave the Spring Pond Beavers alone rather than harassing them and calling them dam names.

If you want the stream "restored" to a dam free-flow condition please contact the beavers -- but if you are going to arrest them, they obviously did not pay any attention to your dam letter, they being unable to read English.

In my humble opinion, the Spring Pond Beavers have a right to build their unauthorized dams as long as the sky is blue, the grass is green and water flows downstream. They have more dam rights than I do to live and enjoy Spring Pond. If the Department of Natural Resources and Environmental Protection lives up to its name, it should protect the natural resources (Beavers) and the environment
(Beavers' Dams).

So, as far as the beavers and I are concerned, this dam case can be referred for more elevated enforcement action right now. Why wait until 1/31/2006? The Spring Pond Beavers may be under the dam ice then and there will be no way for you or your dam staff to contact/harass them.

In conclusion, I would like to bring to your attention to a real environmental quality, health, problem in the area. It is the bears! Bears are actually defecating in our woods. I definitely believe you should be persecuting the defecating bears and leave the beavers alone If you are going to investigate the beaver dam, watch your step! The bears are not careful where they dump!

Being unable to comply with your dam request, and being unable to contact you on your dam answering machine, I am sending this response toyour dam office.

2008 Crowder's Mt. set for 4/26...

...in Gastonia, North Carolina. Link to Race Application may be found at www.teamslug.com or on the Runner's From Hell homesite.

RD Sam b. warns,

RFH/Team Slug reserves the right to refuse anyone who they don't like from running in this race. You know who you are. If you are offended by this application then you are too sensitive to run this course.. It will probably be cold, raining, snowing, or something and you will probably fall. People fall and are killed yearly at Crowders. Usually it is a drunk trying to fly like Superman off one of the cliffs. I release all of those involved in this race from liability. I have been informed not to complain about the hills.

I've known Sam for a long tyme; I'd take him at his word.

Happy Days, Hitman.

Mr.Cantrell on "Why they quit."

Originally posted on the Ultralist, and republished here with permission of Mr. Cantrell. The Barkley is a special event, and for all who have been "out there" it holds an eerie, and dangerous attraction. happy days, john.


"with apologies to those few who have finished the barkley 100,
i dont really believe that it is the exclusive realm of the trail running gods.
as a matter of fact, the fastest 100 milers who have taken to the course
have seldom even finished a fun run.
on the other hand, some of the most successful barkley runners
have never made much of a splash anywhere else.
about the only credentials that seem to translate directly into barkley success
are multi-day trail "records".
people with fast thru-hikes on the AT, PCT, etc, have done quite well.
past & future winners of 100's like WS & Vt have had their difficulties.

for the experienced trail runner, Barkley is a different sort of animal.
the suicidal downhill speed that translates into fast times elsewhere is just
suicidal here.
the key abilities, instead, are a high tolerance for climbing and sleep
deprivation.
this one is more geared toward an ultrarunning vito antofuermo than a sugar ray
leonard.
(yeah, people are lining up to become human punching bags. go figure?)

unlike most ultras, the fast runners dont exactly run off and leave the slow
runners.
people who hike up to the fire tower to watch the runners pass thru the 12 mile
checkpoint
almost always comment on how close together everyone is.
"i thought they'd be all strung out, like other races. but everyone is really
close."
the leader at 20 miles is usually around 8 hours and the laggards around 10,
altho once a runner spirals into despair, with the attendant twenty rest breaks
a mile,
miles per hour turns into hours per mile, and the game is over.

why is this?
i think the answers are in the numbers.
when a highway has a 3% grade, they put up signs warning trucks.
when a highway has a 5% or greater grade, they have special speed limits,
and runaway truck ramps.
in 100 miles of barkley, 95 of those miles are on gradients of more than 5%.
87 miles are on gradients of more than 10%.
50 miles (fully half the race) are on gradients greater than 20%.
there are even 11 miles done on gradients over 30%.
some people love the thing, some hate it.
i think they will all agree, it is hell out there.
normal humans can only tolerate so much abuse.

no one can go fast, but as long as you keep going, you can only go so slow.
it isnt likely that you will exceed the time limit, until you have given up.
the nastiness of the 60 hour limit is that, while attainable,
it does not leave enough time for rest.
once you figure in the night-time slowdown,
there simply is no chance to dawdle anywhere, much less sleep.

and this is why people quit.
taking an endless hammering from the course,
the clock constantly nipping at their heels,
trying to adjust as the weather fluctuates wildly from hour to hour,
staying focused every second, so they wont get off course,
lonely, in pain, no chance to relax,
the relentless pressure, all day and all night, day after day,
sooner or later, something has to give.
99% of the time, it is the runner.

i can excuse people who want to try it once,
it sounds so cool and exciting.
but those who go back are very special people...
only in the short-bus sense of the word special.
because the reality is like being punched in the face for 2 and a half days."

laz

Wrong-Way Charlie sends greetings...

...and no, I am not making this up. All Slugs eventually come home, All of Them. and there is no better slug out there than Charlie. he says,

Hello 'hitman'?
Long thyme Know sea?
Sorry I missed the 18th annual fattest butt ... My black slug shirt has been in the ash bin of history for about ten years. Hope that you're doing well.
charlie wojcik

and in honor of charlie, we're reposting one of his greatest essays...

How to Finish Last Anywhere/Anytime

Are you considering running your first marathon or ultra and worried about coming in first, or even just beating another runner? Well, fast forward right past that, because it doesn’t have to happen. Not if you listen to me. This article will address the likelihood, however distant, that you will be last. This is an area in which I excel. I have had three or more last place finishes in each of the previous seven years. With the right training and preparation, or should I say the lack of such, you too can finish last. That is assuming you are not in direct competition with me. After all, I am the master.

There is no steadfast rule to being last, and luck helps. To increase the odds of being last you must first visualize it in your mind. Believe it deeply and know it to be so. Prior to the race go around behind all the runners and look at the back of their heads. If it’s a track run, that’s all you should ever be seeing. If it’s a trail run, you’ll only see them once, and then their heads will slowly shrink, then quickly disappear. In a large group at the start line close your eyes, look skyward, spread your arms like an eagle, and begin chanting out loud. This will give you a lot of starting space and help to size up your competitors. Start slowly and ease off. This is an area where Slugs have a great advantage. They not only preach this philosophy, but they live and breathe it. Be in no rush out of the starting gate. If logistics allow, begin running in the wrong direction. As people yell for you to stop, just wave at them and smile. This most certainly will confuse the race workers and allow you to waste a bit more time.

Finally however you will be forced to start. Pick up the pace ever so slowly. Watch the cutoffs; they are there to give prima donna race directors a chance to discredit the truly slothful. Remember if you get pulled, you will be unable to finish last. This defeats your goal. Maintain constant glacier-like speed throughout the run. Avoid “jack rabbit” starts and screeching stops. Take a break at the aid station. Relax, have a cup of coffee and make faces at the other runners at they roll by. Remove shoes to check for foreign objects. Tiny rocks do bad things to tiny toes. Ask for some Vaseline, and request assistance in placing it on your most delicate parts. Consume mass quantities of fuel and liquid. Instead of grabbing two Oreos, pick up the entire package and gobble them down. Shovel them in and chew. Get that good full feeling going. Remember watering the flora and fauna with blown pretzel chunks and bile is sound ecological policy and earns you bogus points in the standings. Ask the other runners and aid workers lots of meaningless questions. After asking, refuse to listen to their answers. Start humming profusely. Absolutely confuse them with your wit.

Dehydration, boredom, and loneliness are the three biggest obstacles for the mental deficients drawn to running insane distances. Avoid running with friends. Even better, avoid having any friends. After all, you never know where one may appear. It will be hard not to resist picking up the pace during times of high spirits. If you feel good immediately stop running. Begin doing jumping jacks on one leg until you feel dizzy and sick. Then continue running. On the other hand, you will have no trouble going slowly when you feel lousy. And you will. Enjoy it, soak it in, and share your agony with anyone who will listen. Cry, moan, and howl out loud. The more noise you make, and attention you attract the better. On a track run, practice getting in the way of the real runners. If possible trip and fall over at least once an hour. That means in a 24-hour run you should trip at least 24 times. My personal record is 39 falls in 24 hours. Granted, it was raining. On a trail run, enjoy a hobby such as stopping to gaze at wildlife, or turning wayward turtles upside down. Don’t worry someone will put them back.

If someone tries to get behind you, immediately lay down on the ground. I don’t care if you’re at an aid station or not. Just lie down and begin sobbing. Do not move until that runner gets back in front of you. This is your race to lose, your time in the sun. Don’t let some other loser take what’s rightfully yours. Stand up, be proud, and finish last. In conclusion, and most importantly, please make note of the irrefutable physical fact that it takes the same amount of energy to run slowly as it does to run quickly. This is the law. The Running Law and thou shalt not break it. Do not be concerned with being barred from the event. There are thousands of events. It would take 200 years to get kicked out of all of them. You’ll never live that long.

In my next article, I will share helpful hints for failing in a 100 mile run. Those are going to take a lot more, or less, effort. Work hard on today’s lessons, worst of luck to you, and see you in the loser’s circle.

Charlie “Wrong Way” Wojick

Salt at Barkley??? That Explains IT !!!

Laz,

If memory serves me correctly, you started the RFH and TS feud years
ago at the Strolling Jim. You said those exact words regarding the same
table with Slugs and RFH members. I always wondered why you salt the trails
and now I know.

LV would be your kind of race/run/walk/etc.

TAZ
Pres, Slugs From Hell

Yankee Slugs...headed SOUTH !!!

i think we all know the slugs are not worthy to eat at the same table with
the RFH.

and it warms my heart to know that SC parks love ultrarunners almost as much
as the tennessee parks love us.
if ya'll are gonna run as bandits i might have to try & enter.
havent ever been arrested for walking on a hiking trail.... yet.

if i am in the company of a terrorist leader at the same time,
it ought to make a good clipping for my scrapbook.

laz

Ranger Rick harassing one of our Finest!

Hey Ultra Runners,
The religion debate will piss many off. I am one of those in
the majority and a Christian. Proud of it and don't care what any of
you think.

Now the real questions. Are Runner from Hell runners better than Team Slug
runners? Or will a truce be signed and both groups crash the Laurel Valley
Ultra because a permit has not been granted after several phone calls and
the application for a permit was sent in August. The Special Use Permit
Ranger said that my application is in a stack of papers, "over there".

And according to Janet Reno I am also a leader of a terrorist group.

Claude Sinclair
Runner from Hell and SC Team Slug

Pokey / Grand-Poobah Promoted !!!

Chief Slug Running Man has sent top-secret, slug-coded notice (via FedEx) to the East Coast Director of all Team Slug Operations that promotions have been approved. Pokey-Slug has been named President of all Delaware Slugs, and will be assisted by the Grand-Poobah of the Eastern Shore.

Pokey comes to the Slugs with outstanding slogging credentials, and a big heart. Unlike most of the Slugs she is highly-educated with a real job. As a biochemist she shares two thoughts. First, don't drink the water directly out of the Slug-pond. And second, Mexico makes fine tequila. Finally, Pokey is a Hokie. Now how ya gonna beat that!

The Grand-Poobah (due to ongoing numerous slug-names) appears to be ably following in the slug-tracks of one Mister John Clark, The man with a thousand nicknames, the famed overhand midnight bowler, the man with two much scalp and not enough hair. Yes, the same John Clark that shoved da'Hitman over a fifty foot sand bank in Virginia Beach so as to secure third place at the '94 Flatlander, and gain a coveted bottle of Jim Beam for himself. Dang we miss ole JC, and his gal-pal
Big Bertha.

Salaries and benefits have not been made public, however it is suspected that the compensation package includes lots of Dogfish Head Ale, and Ginger Brandy. Expect more information to follow in the weeks and months ahead. Regardless of Ranger Rick, an abundance of sea-salt, and absolute disregard for any moral decency, the Slugs appear to have gained a foothold, and should be leaving a slimy trail through the First State for years to come.

From Key West (where da'fishins good, and the beer is cold)
Flattest Foot Freddie.

Everything's FROZEN in the First State...

Yes, it was twelve degrees on the back porch this morning; and i thought hard about getting back into bed. But, if i'd crawled under those warm sheets, and fallen asleep; i'd have missed those couple of hours with pokey on the frozen tundra of central delaware. and, God knows; i enjoy my time on the trails; with pokey. the pond was frozen this morning, and nothing was crawling out of it. bright sun, clear day, with absolutely "pizzed-off" squirrels throwing stuff at us...perfect day; perfect run, as we wake up daily, one day at a time; and try to get fit, for the spring; frozen and iced up beard, beer slushies, and a glazed pond. life is good in delaware; but lets face it. Sluggos belong in Florida!!!

happy days,
hitman

Tornadoes hit Mississippi...Too Close Home...

"If anybody is wondering:Where are the young idealists? Where are the people willing to devote themselves to causes larger than themselves? They are in uniform in Iraq and Afghanistan straddling the divide between insanity and order." David Brooks

hitman and allslugs;

forwarding pics of recent tornado at caledonia high school. you know sometimes we take our life and our possessions for granted. we get upset over things that don't even matter. i'm sending you a couple of pics to share how quickly life changes. i miss my slug-buds and hope to see ya back in n'orleans real soon. for God's sake; ENJOY EACH MOMENT, and try to stay out of trouble :)

gator-bait
gulf coast ufo division
team slug int'l.

State of the Slugs : 2008

We live in a crazy world; that's for sure. Change seems inevitable and constant. And, we live with it. Over the past nineteen years we've all evolved; we're definitely not the same people we were in 1989. Looking at this pic, always takes me back. Me and da'hitman were brothers, and always will be. We didn't save the world, but we sure made a lot of friends.

First, I see below that Mr. Clean checked in, and I have to agree with him in congratulating the newest Sluggos. Welcome aboard! I really have a hard time imagining we're still handing out those old black slug shirts. But we are. You know I've tried to explain Team Slug over the years to hundreds of people. At marathons / ultras around the country that shirt is a great conversation starter.

I try to share with other runners that TSI is not actually a running club. Not like the Peninsula Track Club or Virginia Happy Trails Club. Rather, we're a "state of mind", maybe an idea whose time has past. Hitman and I, all those years ago decided we weren't going to change. We would hold olde-tyme events, all fat-ass style; no aid, no fees, no rules, etc. Period. Always. And it's worked.

While other clubs are holding events with hundreds of entrants, waiting lists, etc; Team Slug is lucky to get twenty to the starting line. And I say "lucky" in the most respectful of ways. Hitman always say, "The right folks show up." And, after all these years I have to agree with him. TSI appears healthy, and poised to continue in holding the most worthy of all non-events.

I think the news has leaked out already; but TSI will be offering "20th Anniversary Beer Steins" to all the Slug-finishers in the fall in Delaware, Carolina, and Florida. It will be to "kick off" Team Slug's twentieth year in the ultra community; and at the request of one of the original slugs, Mr. James "The All-Niter" Moore.
Rumour also has it that the "Boogy Bayou Swamp Stomp" will return to Okaloosa County out in the Florida Panhandle. Can anyone say, GATOR!!!

Friends, Life is Good; and I appreciate each one of you, and look forward to seeing you on a trail someday soon. Don't worry about looking for me, I'll find you.

Happy Days,
Chief Slug Running Man

The Spell of the Yukon

I wanted the gold, and I sought it, I scrabbled and mucked like a slave.
Was it famine or scurvy -- I fought it; I hurled my youth into a grave.
I wanted the gold, and I got it -- Came out with a fortune last fall, --
Yet somehow life's not what I thought it, And somehow the gold isn't all.

No! There's the land. (Have you seen it?) It's the cussedest land that I know,
From the big, dizzy mountains that screen it; To the deep, deathlike valleys below.
Some say God was tired when He made it; Some say it's a fine land to shun;
Maybe; but there's some as would trade it; For no land on earth -- and I'm one.

You come to get rich (damned good reason); You feel like an exile at first;
You hate it like hell for a season, And then you are worse than the worst.
It grips you like some kinds of sinning; It twists you from foe to a friend;
It seems it's been since the beginning; It seems it will be to the end.

There's a land where the mountains are nameless, And the rivers all run God knows where;
There are lives that are erring and aimless, And deaths that just hang by a hair;
There are hardships that nobody reckons; There are valleys unpeopled and still;
There's a land -- oh, it beckons and beckons, And I want to go back -- and I will.

There's gold, and it's haunting and haunting; It's luring me on as of old;
Yet it isn't the gold that I'm wanting; So much as just finding the gold.
It's the great, big, broad land 'way up yonder, It's the forests where silence has lease;
It's the beauty that thrills me with wonder, It's the stillness that fills me with peace.

Robert Service in 1907

Greetings From the Heartland...

and, first let me say Congratulations! to all the new Slugs; and welcome (i've been following the '08 fattest butt story). there are hundreds of lies about this little gang of hoodlums, and how each came to be slugs. my entry into the "Warped-World" of Running Man & Co. came in the fall of 1990. and, it is TRUE. in the spring i had graduated from florida state university in tallahassee, and september found me sitting in a graduate statistics class at ODU in norfolk, virginia. just two seats in front of me, and one aisle over sat this short, barrel-chested fellow, that always seemed to be happy and gawking around. but, that's not what drew my attention to him. rather, this squat little fellow always seemed to be talking...about...running, and then giving you a funny, wicked smile. come on slugs, you know which one i mean, right???

now i was no athlete, though i did "throw back some serious 12 oz. curls" at fsu, back in the day. then, there was the intramural jello wrestling. but, i'll save that for another letter. as the semester wore on, myself and this odd fellow became fast friends. and we talked, running. and not just jogging for fun, 5k stuff, but marathoning; and intervals, and protein shakes, and hundred dollar pairs of shoes. he seemed to have a one track mind. just when i thought i'd heard it all he told me he was running fifty miles this weekend.

course, i didn't believe him; but did agree to meet him out in western maryland, at a tiny, teenie, little ultra-event; best known as jfk. and he ran, and wobbled, and struggled, and finished. i was smitten, not with this "psycho endurance athlete" but with the idea or running until i couldn't run any further. course the thought was fleeting, and once i saw his toes, and the way he walked for three days, i quickly came to my senses.

until about a month later at mr.taco in virginia beach. we were sucking down tacos and inhaling some cheap beer. life as graduate students ... GUUUUUDD. we were feeling better and better, and as drunk young men do began to get incorrigible toward one another. bottom line, he challenged me to finish a Slug-run, and i was so "wasted" i agreed, shook hands, and signed in ink. there WERE witnesses(who were sober). now, i don't know about you all, but in iowa where i come from a man's word, is his word. it was a done deal. my ass was grass.

so, da'hitman convenes every sluggo in southeastern virginia; and conjures up this fifty kilometer track run...in TWO days. i can't back out, and i can't lie; though i'd never ran over five miles, he had convinced me i could finish. First mistake, i believed him; Second mistake, i wanted that Black Slug Shirt way too bad. though i can't lie, to this day, 16 years later, it's still my favorite t-shirt (though folks never believe how i came to get it)

there's not much else to tell. the pic at the top says it all. i did finish; 124 laps in just under nine hours. it was not pretty, and i was not happy about it. but, i refused to quit. i would prove him wrong, and take my shirt home. and i did. and i was pissed at him for months. i was sure he'd tried to kill me. in fact, i've never ran again, NEVER, not even a 5k. but, i'm still a slug.

and, now after all these years; i look back on that day with great joy. further, i'd share that i've been fortunate to have been loved by a lot of family and friends in this lifetime; but there are few that have given me what that "insane, dangerous, smiling, barrel-chested slug" gave me on that cool saturday morning all those years ago.
as my olde drinking buddy flatfoot fred would say...
happy days,

john "mr.clean" sorenson
president
tsi, iowa farming division

p.s. all those nasty rumours about the mayor's wife in amish country are true :)

My First Ultra: Team Slug Fattest Butt

Sluggos,

Here's a great read, from a Beautiful Lady, and Brand-New Slug.
I know it's a bit long, and most of us "ain't" that bright,
but this one is worth your time.

She also has a nice blog at; http://1inthedistance.wordpress.com

Friends & Family back in Carolina call her Andrea B.
but, to the Slugs she'll always be Tiny Broken-Hiney.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nonevent: Team Slug International Fattest Butt 50K (approximately 32 miles)
When & Where: 8:20 a.m. Jan. 5, Kent County, Delaware
Results: 6:05 (1st female)

While focusing on marathon training for the past several years, I’ve been inspired by knowing several ultrarunners and especially by watching merigayle persistently finish her first 100 mile run at Umstead last year. On Saturday I joined their lowest ranks as I took my first strides beyond the marathon distance. Those not quite nimble steps were at times challenging and humbling, mostly fun, and always in good company:

Kickrunners DEturtle, Durt, divaleh, merigayle, SGH, roots

Last fall, I decided to put any remaining fitness from the Kiawah Island Marathon toward a 50K. The ultrarunning group Durt and DEturtle are part of, Team Slug International, organizes an informal one each January outside of Dover, Del. The Fattest Butt 50K "nonevent" is TSI’s variation on a "Fat Ass" run.

As it turned out the Fattest Butt would dramatically change the appearance of my own derriere and, in the process, become the week’s second and true Wardrobe Malfunction run.

Festivities started Friday night when some of us met at a Dover Italian eatery for pre-run carbs. Between bites of bread and pasta, first-timers divaleh and I had many questions for ultrarunners DEturtle and roots. Then it was time to do the usual race preparation routine of getting my gear and clothing ready to go for the morning before bed.

The next morning I woke up a few minutes before my alarm and did not want to get out of the very cozy, warm, and enticing pillow-top bed. I could have stayed under the covers all day. After a few minutes of coaxing, I forced myself from the comfort zone and quickly dressed to converge upon the well-stocked hotel breakfast for coffee and my usual pre-long run meal: oatmeal with peanut butter. DEturtle came back to lead a caravan to the park. Race Director Durt ushered us in and runners began casually setting up water and fueling items on picnic tables. Everyone was exchanging introductions and appearing very relaxed. The pre-run routine and atmosphere drastically contrasted marathons, where I get up three hours early to digest breakfast and arrive at a starting area swarming with striding runners and buzzing with nervous energy.

After a short briefing and prayer the run started. Again there was no typical road marathon start of jostling and swerving. Heck, there wasn’t a Start line! DEturtle led us out on the 3.2-mile packed dirt trail circling Killens Pond. We would retrace the route 10 times to reach the 50K distance, passing through the picnic area each time for provisions. The sun brightened a partly-cloudy sky and made the 30-degree air feel comfortable.

I spent the first two loops running and chatting with merigayle and divaleh, and trying to memorize the trail. Durt’s directions had been a simple “keep the pond to your left,” and after the first two loops I felt oriented and ready to spend a little quiet me time in the woods. Gradually I pulled away and hoped I would meet up with "the girls" in the late loops when I anticipated needing encouragement. I had not done any training specific to a 50K other than run a marathon four weeks earlier, recover for a very easy week, then return to regular easy running with one 16 mile long run thrown in on Dec. 22. Total winging it. Everyone had assured me that was more than enough as long as I took the 50K at an easy pace, but I was still questioning my sanity and a little bit doubting if I could complete the distance. It seemed like such a long way, so I decided to simply think of it as 10 loops instead of a specific amount of mileage.

Even for a coastal dweller, the course’s few small inclines barely intensified my breathing. To give my legs a break, I began walking the “ups” and otherwise running the “flats” and “downs.” Without nearby trails to run regularly where I live I was overjoyed to have a good part of the day ahead to be on the path, and spent some time in appreciation of the surroundings.

Before coming in to the aid station for Loop 5, I noticed that my hands were starting to swell. I usually don’t experience that so early in a long run, especially when drinking Gatorade as I had been. I spent a little extra time at the picnic area and took an electrolyte tablet along with a portion of peanut butter and honey sandwich for some extra energy. I had a surge of energy and motivation as I headed out, and was ready to make some good progress.

My pace picked up to what felt like marathon pace and I had the sensation of flying along the trail. It was a serious runner’s high enhanced even more by the natural setting, always my favorite for reflective running. Last night at dinner we had talked about a different event, the Self-Transendence Marathon in New York, but I felt on the verge of my own enlightening endurance episode in the middle of Delaware. On his 6th loop, roots caught up to me now, and I was enthusiastically evangelizing about what a great trip I was having:

“I feel amazing! This is so much fun!”

“It’s such a beautiful day!”

“I just have to watch my footing a little more on this trail! Especially the downhills! I feel a little off-balance going down!”

“But, this is THE BEST!”

Wheeee … I took flight and time slowed as I floated peacefully for what seemed like 10 seconds before coming down hard on my right side. THUD! So much for self-transcendence! I was shocked to find myself face down in the dirt. Not wanting to break the great rhythm I’d had, I moved to get right back up – but was stuck to something. My running tights were clinging to a small stump that left a 3″ hole in the seat of my tights as I stood. roots walked with me for a minute and I remarked “Damn, this is the second time this week I am running with my ass hanging out!” He instructed me to put on his extra pants when I got back to the picnic area, then ran ahead so I could focus on staying upright rather than on talking to another runner. I took two Tylenols to prevent any aching and felt truly lucky to be uninjured and pain-free after that fall. I quickly resumed running, but at a more conservative pace and with my eyes firmly fixed on the trail. When I came upon hikers, I covered the hole with my hand which I'm sure looked ridiculous -- a runner going along grabbing her own butt.

Back in the picnic area there was a little show & tell with my boo-tay boo-boo. Durt and the Assistant Race Director Debbie immediately began showing their genuine concern by taking close-up photos of my bloody butt, but Durt did graciously help me put on the other pants. They fit perfectly and after a cautioning to take it easier and be safe by race volunteer John I was ready for the second five loops.

Maybe it was the fall or the break in momentum with a longer stop, but Loops 6 and 7 were groggy. I wasn’t running slower yet, but I felt less coordinated and alert. I kept thinking how a nap would be perfect and daydreaming about that pillow-top bed I’d get to crawl into later. Everyone told me I would have a low period, so I figured I was experiencing the ultra lull. It still wasn’t anywhere near the struggles I’ve worked thorough in marathons, so I just thought positively, kept up my electrolyte-peanut butter sandwich combo at the aid station, and waited for the fatigue to pass. I got a small boost when I came up on DEturtle, who is the cutest ultrarunner ever with her assortment of running skirts and always positive attitude, even though that day she was fighting a fever.

By Loop 8 I felt revived and like a lifelong native of the trail. By now I could anticipate its landmarks: There’s the first bridge. There’s the place where I fell. There’s the cabin area. There’s the good view of the pond that’s just starting to freeze. There’s the tree where dozens of lovers carved their initials.

Before leaving the picnic spot for Loop 9, I knew finishing would be easy and said to Durt “After the next loop I’ll be an ultramarathoner, and one more after that one, I’ll be a Slug!” My legs were heavier now and I was slowing, but still only felt like walking the “ups.” I discovered what merigayle had told me was true, that starting to run again after a walk break is very difficult on tired legs. So I just kept running.

To make sure I learned whatever I am supposed to learn, on Loop 9 just as I noticed I was coming up on the spot where I’d fallen, sure enough I was bowing before the trail gods on hands and knees again in the exact same place. This time I had been shuffling instead of charging, so I got up, shook it off, and kept moving forward. In the aid station I briefly chatted with Durt before setting out on my last and final slog around Killens Pond.

During what I told myself was “the victory lap,” I took a little time to try to come to some personal conclusions about the tiny amount of experience I now had in the sport of ultramarathoning. I would finish in around 6 hours, the longest duration I have spent on a single episode of any physical activity. The whole endeavor seemed a bit ludicrous, yet I could honestly say I’d had a good time the whole way. Being outside on trails has long been therapeutic to me, and something I've dearly missed especially during the last couple years. This activity combined trail time with my favorite sport of distance running. Coming up on 32 miles with plenty of energy left, I had no problem imagining tackling a longer ultra distance event such as a 50 mile run with proper training. Still, I wasn’t sure I liked the relatively slower running pace, and at times had thought about how a nice day hike would be more fun with possibly less chance of injury. The fall had been startling, and more than once I’d thought about dearly held plans for the first half of 2008 that would be shelved if I’d broken a bone. But I hadn’t broken a bone. I wasn’t seriously hurt save for a spectacular huge bruise on my butt, and the pond loop trail was certainly not the last chance for potential injury I’ll encounter between now and April.

In a few minutes I would come in to the picnic area and see friends’ faces sharing my achievement of a personal distance record on foot. In the marathon four weeks’ prior, I was fortunate to gain a huge sense of accomplishment and reward for hard work. But as I gave the Fattest Butt its final pat, I savored feelings of gratitude, appreciation, and joy that I wish everyone could and would experience by simply putting one foot in front of the other. Running has so many rewards, but I think this is among its most precious gifts.

Running to the picnic area for the last time, I heard a few claps and cheers. “I am a Slug!” I yelled in response. Debbie and roots snapped photos of me coming in and receiving my award, the famous bad-ass black Team Slug T-shirt. Finally I was reunited with merigayle and divaleh, who finished four minutes later to all of our applause and excitement.

It was cold if you weren’t running, and divaleh and I went off to change into dry clothes so we could stay as warm as possible. The bath house was closed, so we ended up changing with only the back wall for privacy. Now we were ultrarunners, who are reputed to be the “craziest” in running circles, so stripping in the woods seemed like a natural slightly nutty thing to do. We rejoined the growing number of finishers at the picnic tables and savored delicious Cup-o-Noodles and other snacks before walking back on the trail with merigayle to loosen our legs and remove a few course marking ribbons from branches. meri's husband Turnin'Wrenches came in for his first ultramarathon and first-ever race finish as we headed out, and we got to be the first to congratulate him.

Everyone pitched in to clean up the little spot that helped keep us going that day. Runner and volunteer Slugs alike said congratulations, thank you, and good-bye to each other before spreading out in their various directions, leaving the trail but taking the rewards and memories of its 32 miles.

It was great to share the trail with fellow Kickrunners, get some great tips from meri, Durt, roots & DEturtle, and share the first-timer experience with divaleh and Turnin'Wrenches. Hopefully some more Kickrunners will post reports. I'd love to hear about the day in others' own words.

Lessons Learned at Fattest Butt

Hello Hitman and Fellow Runners,

John Straub invited me to this un-franchised, un-sanctioned, un-organized, non-commercialized, low stress, low cost, highly prized and humanized un-officially healthy non-event run. And below, is what i learned.
Happy Trails
Craig See ( 1/3 Slugger--- finished Nine Miles)

Lesson Learned (and some to forget):

1. Mud does not freeze off at 28 degrees "butt" other things do.

2. When placing one foot in a one foot deep mud hole, ensure to insert the other foot to same depth at same time.

Slugging with only one five pound foot may cause loss of positive traction rear end, a leg and toe muscle building imbalance, audit by the IRS and a total loss of control on high speed down hill curves, and/ or all of the above.

A five pound weight suspended at the end of a long extremity can also cause centrifugal force to wrap owner of said extremity (leg with mud caked foot) several times around a tree at bottom of said steep downhill. This did not happen to me but I envisioned this possibility several times while going very slow.

3. Bring an extra pair of clean shoes for short notice grocery shopping mission after an off-road race.

Wearing one large black mud covered, still dripping black water and making gurgling sounding sneaker brings weird looks from non-trail slug shoppers and various angry loud speaker calls for "Clean Up on Aisles 2, 3, 4 , and 5!"

4. Never send a lone hungry 1/3 slug guy grocery shopping with expired coupons after a race with the entire family food budget. Yes, the canned goods made it home with only minor teeth marks but that gallon of milk and bag of chips was history and I was still drooling the rest of the way home!

'08 Fattest Butt -Thanks for a Great Day!!!

Race photos are available at: 2008 Fattest Butt

What an outstanding non-event! Incredible time, and wonderful people. We really appreciate all coming out. Normally, as after any Slug event, we like to write a funny, but relatively honest account; of each runner's journey toward the famed black shirt. Today, we're going to approach it a bit differently. There's no way we can write a single article about all the fascinating human interest stories that played out in the First State yesterday. The Race Director's have to be thanked for stepping up and helping out. Derek Hills and Debbie Straub (each shown at left while sober) were excellent in performing their duties. They also were entertaining beyond belief, and I'm not talking about the Ginger Brandy incident(I do have proof). They are genuinely kind-hearted and loving folks. So thanks, your time is appreciated. Without volunteers we couldn't have handled this many participants. What I would ask this time is if you were here and ran, and would like to share some thoughts, please send them, we will post. I've included the "Official" account, sent off to Ms.Tia at UR, and the official results. CONGRATS to all the Slugs, olde and new alike!!! happy days, da'hitman.


Memories Made in the First State

Each race we attend brings the opportunity for meeting new people, and renewing old friendships. And many of our Slug friendships are now approaching twenty years. We are thankful to the ultra community, for two decades of challenge and flat out fun. As the Slugs and potential Slugs lined up on the first Saturday of the New Year in the First State, it was hard not to reminisce of years gone by.

Traditionally, we like to include each finisher in our Slug summation. That is because at Team Slug we consider each finisher a great hero, a master of their physical and emotional strength, and a Lifetime Slug. And, they receive the World-Famous black slug shirt to prove it. Today we can’t honor each one, but a few must be mentioned. First, A.J. Johnson, a veteran Slug, ran near the front all day, pulling away in the closing miles for his first win with us. But that’s not why he’s a hero in our book. Rather, A.J. introduced ultra running to his close friend, Jeff Holloway, trained with him, and encouraged him all the way to the finish line. Now Jeff is an ultra marathoner, and a Slug. Look for them at JFK, there is no doubt in my mind they’ll finish together.

On the women’s side, we were blessed to have some determined athletes; using their friendship to turn the day into a joy for all who surrounded them. Coming out on top was Andrea Berninger, who had run in the lead pack all day. She overcame many obstacles on the course including blown over trees, deep swampy mud pits, and a serious contusion on her back side. She easily won the best blood award, but it didn’t deter her from completing the distance, and finishing first among the ladies.

We also had a mother and son finisher. Aaron and Patti Lipschutz ran near each other all day. Aaron, a college student in Boston, was home on Christmas break, and the pair decided to make the quest for the Slug shirts a family affair. What a pleasure to witness the love and compassion of a mother and son. With all that appears wrong with our world, spending the day with their family seemed to ease everyone’s burden. Aaron said his mom really wasn’t a runner, she was a biker. But today, she had enough energy to finish the long winter run.

So another chapter closes on Team Slug, and we remind all our ultra running friends. Your finishing time is not so important, not who you are. There are always those faster, and slower, than you. What is important is that you don’t give up. When you wake up and pull on those magical running shoes, step outside into the cool, fresh air, and begin to put one foot in front of another, you are fighting the good fight. You are making things better for yourself, and for those around you. So from Slug-land, thanks! Hope to see you on the trails, real soon.

Flatfoot Freddie

TSI's Fattest Butt
January 5th, 2008
Kent County, Delaware

1. A.J. Johnson NJ M 4:26:00
2. Frank Gousman, Jr. NJ M 4:27:00
3. Josh Dennis NJ M 4:36:00
4. Jess Manning DE M 4:51:00
5. Lloyd Thomas OH M 4:52:00
6. Steve Wehrle NJ M 4:55:00
7. Louis D'Onofrio NJ M 5:09:00
8. Gilles Barbeau BC M 5:22:00
9. Dan Rosenberg NJ M 5:32:00
10. John Straub DE M 5:46:00
11. Jeff Holloway NJ M 5:49:00
12. Ravi Gooneratne PA M 5:58:00
13. Andrea Berninger NC F 6:05:00
14. MeredithMurphy PA F 6:09:00
15. Staci Rudnitsky NY F 6:09:00
16. John Lysinger MD M 6:14:00
17. Aaron Lipschutz MA M 6:35:00
18. Patti Lipschutz PA F 6:47:00
19. Phillip Hesser MD M 6:47:00
20. Anders Grant MD F 6:51:00
21. Richard Monroe MD M 6:51:00
22. Larry Macon TX M 6:52:00
23. Carl Camp DE M 7:05:00
24. Edward Murphy PA M 7:14:00
25. Eugene Bruckert IL M 9:20:00

28 Starters, 25 Finishers.

*Miguel Verdun Gomez of VA, finished 27 miles in 8:20, and
was awarded a "Slug Mug" for the 2nd consecutive year. There
is no doubt in my mind he would have finished the 50K,
had he not fallen into the sinking mudd hole... I know,
I found it, and fell in, while sweeping the course,
this morning :)

18th Fattest Butt in the books...

...and I am tired. And, grateful. What a beautiful day in Slug-Land. 28 wonderful ultrarunners stepped up to the plate in Kent County, Delaware, to take a swing at Slug immortality. For when one finishes a Slug-run; one is intiated forever into Slugdom. For the young flashy, fast runners; it may not mean much, and the black shirts earned / worn proudly by many hundreds of previous athletes may be tucked away in the drawer.

But my friends, I have been doing this long enough to know some things. First, everyone Slows Down. You may not believe me, but just wait ten, or twenty years. You'll either slow down, or retire from running. And, when one slows down one looks back at those days when they were younger, and free; and the bright sunny ultra days gone by, seem like joyful drops of memory, raining love onto their souls. And one things for sure. The Slug-runs may be small and disorganized, but those running them know why they're here. They are drawn here, to become part of something that can not be bought. It has to be earned, with sweat and determination.

I usually struggle with the pictures to post on the site or blog. Not today, I wanted this one up, to remind us all of what is important in our lives. It shows a mother and son (Patti and Aaron Lipschutz of Philly and Boston, repectively), together earning the Slug-shirt. They obviously love each other dearly and have countless memories to share. Now they have another, and God I am so thankful to have been a part of it. This is what matters my friends. Your family, and those close to you. Tell them you love them, and hug them every chance you get. Time is precious, and Life is shorter than you think.

Happy Days,
da' Hitman.

p.s. Full Story, Results, and Pics will be posted to www.teamslug.com within 24 hours.

T - 15 hrs...and the excuses are pourin' in;

...the non-sluggos are finally coming to their senses. i've had two cancellations in the past 24 hours, and their excuses are outstanding. i'm tempted to send out a black slug shirt for the best story about "why i can't come to the slug-run." let's face it, those who decide not to come, are probably much wiser than the rest of us. getting out of bed on a cold winter's morning, trying to find delaware (the state is not even on u.s. maps prior to 1787), and then being forced to death-slog through a forest inhabited by known predators, on a minimal sustenance of pond water and stale bread. there just ain't nothin' pretty about it. NOTHIN'. furthermore, the park rangers aren't sure if that swamp monster in the pond has legs or not. one things for certain, that monster's definitely big enough to ambush, and then chomp on some poor unsuspecting, weary, delusion, cold, and frightened sluggo. if you don't believe me, just ask derek; he was danged lucky to escape the beast last january. as a last minute precaution, i'd advise all to carry pepper spray, timber-bug repellent, and finish before dark. you know, just to be safe.

From the All-Niter to All-Slugs...

Sluggos,

A very Happy New Year's wish to all the Slugs. I've waited until the very last minute to send this because I was still hoping to participate in the Fattest Butt (even as a bandit), since the field was full, including the lottery, with all those that could not get in. I do know it is the best non-event to start '08. Tell all we said hello, send LOVE and will be wishing we were there.

All-Nighter and Sluggette

Happy New Year to Slug's everywhere!

Team Slug has made it to 2008. Chief Slug Running Man himself called from a drinking establishment of ill-repute (complete with scantily / not clad ladies --- i know because, he sent pics over his phone) in Panama City Beach last night to send greetings to the Slugs. He is very excited about the "State of da' Slugs." We are just one short year now from reaching our 20th Anniversary year (Fall non-event 2009); and are hoping for a TSI Reunion Run. He's thinking Florida or South Carolina (home of the famed, and super-secret Slugs from Hell, so we'll see as it gets closer.

Here in the First State, we're now just a few days from the Fattest Butt. This will be the 18th Consecutive year TSI has held this non-event, and we have a good field assembled. Lots of prospective Slugs have registered, and i expect most to finish. Wisely, hundreds of past Slugs are not coming; though we do remember and appreciate each one of them.

At Team Slug, our goal is to keep moving; and as any / all of us grow older, we're going to slow down and slug / slog. But, we're still here, and still moving. And to us, that's what counts. So we're glad to have you along, no matter what level of "speed" you bring to the course. Of course, speed is relative. There is always somebody, faster or slower; always!

I've also been fielding several questions related to Slug merchandise and the Cafe Press. It was set up by Pavvy, The Big Brown Pony. And, if you don't know him, then i'm sorry. He is one of the Greatest Slugs ever to pull on a black t-shirt. He runs slower & longer, than anyone i know. While I haven't personally used the service, several of the Florida Slugs have ordered off the site, and are satisfied with their purchases. Again, i've seen pics of the thongs --- it ain't pretty :)

For the prospective Slugs coming to Fattest Butt; you will have the Opportunity to purchase one of the Original Black 100% Cotton Team Slug t-shirts. While we are not an "Official Club" and this is a "Non-event"; you will always be a member of our little gang of bandits. Running Clubs / Running Events may come and go; but Slugs are Forever. Veteran Slugs who've already earned the shirt will receive a Team Slug trinket, this year the Finisher's Mug. It is two-sided with the Slug logo on one side, and this logo on the other:



I believe several of you all have a collection of them from past years. Running Man asked me to share that the 2008 Russell B. Cheney event, to be held on September 27th (da' Hitman's birthday); will feature a Team Slug 20th Anniversary Beer Drinking Stein. This is in honor, and at the special request of Brother James "The All-Niter" Moore. Wow, I wonder what James will do with a beer stein ???

Finally, the TSI Executive Board is finalizing the decision on the upcoming TSI 2008 Hall of Fame announcement. I think you all will be pleased. OK, I'm back off to Key West to do some surf fishin' with Running Man. No doubt, da' Hitman will assure that all coming to Fattest Butt WILL enjoy their day amongst Slugs.

Happy New Year,
Flatfoot Freddie

Slug Course fraught with danger...

...i was out this morning, snooping around the course. wet leaves are still covering the foot hazards, and the wooden walkways (over the swamps) are like ice. you can skate across them, and one slip, you're going over the edge. all in all, the trail is in fair / good shape. till you get to the last half mile. construction continues! so i sneaked around looking for a good path to cross back over to the start / finish area. due to the increased pond-monster sightings ranger rick has guard dogs and snipers posted. we definitely won't be sneaking through the construction site. so, i found an old trail, maybe a quarter mile long to hash through. i'm gonna call it the gary cantrell section (if you don't know who g.c. is then you need to come to my house after the run and drink some brew.) i wish all a happy new year. be careful out there this evening, if you're going out. i want to see ya next saturday. happy days, john.

Final Preparations underway for ’08 Fattest Butt….

The course appears to be in fair/good condition, though there is continuing construction on a short stretch. This will create a minor detour, but won’t add significantly to the mileage. Pokey and I were out on it yesterday, and there are a lot of leaves covering the roots, stumps, and other assorted bumps. This means, especially if it’s wet, you’ll probably need to slow down a bit and be extra careful. While the course is basically flat, there are some very short hills (up and down); and stretches of wooden walkway (covering swampy areas) that when wet get slick as sh(i)t. No joke, if not careful you could easily break something out there. Nearly each non-event someone departs good ole Dela-where requiring a couple of stitches. Makes for great pics, but we don’t want anyone hurt.

OK, you’ve seen the non-event instructions below. This is NOT a race. We’re a small gang of slugs / potential slugs; out for a long winter’s run. Please check in promptly at 800 AM in the main parking lot, one mile inside the main entrance of the park. I’d love to get you all started by 820, definitely no later than, 830. Following each loop, I ask that you check in with whoever’s keeping the times. I’m a runner myself, and know exactly how we are. We may be non- competitive as haile, but we still want our times right. I can dig that. However, we will be operating fat ass format, skeleton crew, and need your assistance.

TSI will supply pond-water and stale bread, though Pokey (and she knows) advises you not to drink it. Please bring whatever food / drink stuff you need to finish. A communal table will be set up if you would like to bring anything to share.

There is no time limit, but the park closes at dark. You’ll have approximately eight hours to finish. If you are not finished, we will move the vehicles outside the park, and somehow we’ll work out a deal to let you finish. There is no reason to quit, except you don’t want to run no more.

All first-time finishers will have an opportunity to buy the slug shirt, and if you’re one of the vets I’ve got some sweet 2008 Finisher Slug-Muggs. Also a few truckers’ hats are left over from the fall if you’re interested. All are Ten U.S. Dollars, or trade, in-kind. Other TSI logo apparel may be purchased on-line at Café Press.

Finally, I appreciate you taking the time out of your winter schedule and joining us for this non-event. We always have a good time, and I’m excited to be seeing some old friends, and meeting some new ones. If you have any questions / concerns my home number is (302)678-3325, and my cell number morning of race is (302)399-6409. See ya in less than a week.

John.

Chief Army Slug checks in...

...and will not be attending Fattest Butt. That means the field is wide open, and we could be welcoming a new champ into the fold. Mark sends the following greetings:

Dear Da' Hitman,

Nearly settled in San Antonio; nice to be focused on a
different part of world for a change. The middle east
was starting to wear on me. Wanted to pass along my
holiday wishes. Unfortunately, I will not be able to
make this years fattest butt. I will however be
thinking of you all as I attempt the Bandera 100K on the
same day. Hopefully the race director won't keep on
telling me I'm running too slow; always a tough crowd
at the pond!

Have a great new year,

Chief Army Slug

Mark Crisman

{...and of course, he's referring to nearly breaking four hours,
and then having the non-event director (Ms.Lisa, my personal favorite
Non-Event Director in the whole world) tell him he's slowing down.
It really was funny; but suppose you had to be there...}

Of course, as the years pass; the "words between the two" will
become more and more exaggerated, until they are outright lies.
It's the Slug-Way.

Merry Christmas Sluggos ...

Yes, it's true ... Santa is a Slug. Don't act surprised; check out his bee-hind in this picture. Probably the Original Fattest Butt. Happy Days Friends, and Merry Christmas.

2008 Fattest Butt Instructions...

1. This is a Non-Event in the truest of olde-tyme fat ass fashion. This is a group of friends getting together on a winter morning to complete a long run. Due to the lack of ultras in the First State we will have a timekeeper, and results will be posted on the internet and submitted to Ultrarunning Magazine. UR has for many years, been kind enough to support our small band of stragglers. This will allow those attempting to complete a marathon / ultra in fifty states to notch up Delaware. It is NOT an official event. It will NOT qualify you for Boston.

2. There will be no numbers for you to wear, no aid stations, and no markings on the course. If you see Ranger Rick wish him a fine day; but remember, we are not holding an organized race. We are olde & new friends, sluggos, out getting some early season exercise. This is one rule Team Slug has never had to exaggerate about. We have been disorganized from Day One.

3. The course is not marked. It is a hiking path around a pond. It is mostly flat, and certainly must be considered one of the easiest fifty k’s in the world. Ten loops, with access to your aid after each five kilometers. Team Slug will supply pond water and stale bread. If you need any special food / fuel to finish; please bring it. Feel free to bring extra; there will be a communal table. There is NO time limit, but the park closes at dark. If necessary, we will move vehicles outside of park to a nearby school; and assist you in finishing your run. We’d prefer you not quit.

4. Again, this is NOT a real race. There is NO entry fee. That’s right, it is FREE. Bandits are encouraged to participate. There are no particular rules. Cheating in an ultra is completely defeating the purpose. However, if you complete the tenth lap in less than four hours; you will either be disqualified, or allowed to complete one more lap. We don’t want any more fast slugs; we’ve got enough of them.

5. If you finish ten laps; you are authorized (not required) to purchase the World-Famous 100% Cotton, Black Team Slug T-Shirt. At that point; you will be scarred for Life / a Marked Ultra-Runner / a Slug Forever. Be aware hundreds of the finest and lousiest ultra runners in the world have earned this shirt. If you already have a T-Shirt, a 2008 TSI Finisher’s mugg will be available for purchase. We have a few truckers’ hats left over from the fall also, if you prefer one of those. These are available for Ten U.S. Dollars each. Trades in kind considered.

6. Please be at the main entrance of Killen’s Pond State Park in Kent County, Delaware by 0745 on Saturday morning. The gates usually open about 0800, and we should get the run started by 0830. Please don’t ask me for directions. Delaware is a small state. If you can’t find the park, it wouldn’t be safe for you to be near the pond. I will have my cell phone on that morning if you need to reach me. The number is (302)399-6409.

The field is set for the 18th Fattest Butt....

Congrats to all...
Details in next week...or so !!!

...The Lucky Twenty-Nine....
Fattest Butt Confirmed Victims:

1. Amanda Bundek, DE
2. Derek Hills, MD
3. Louis D'Onofrio, NJ
4. Gilles Barbeau, Vancouver, BC
5. Jess Manning, DE
6. Josh Dennis, NJ
7. Phillip Hesser, MD
8. John Straub, DE
9. Debbee Straub, DE
10. Larry Macon, GA
11. Mike Kulakowski, PA
12. Meredith Murphy, USA
13. Edward Murphy, USA
14. A.J. Johnson, NJ
15. Jeff Holloway, NJ
16. Carl Camp, DE
17. Alisa Springman, PA
18. Miguel Gomez Verdun, VA
19. Andrea Berninger, NC
20. Terri Hayes, SC
21. Frank Gousman Jr, NJ
22. Staci Rudnitsky, NYC
23. Lloyd Thomas, OH
24. Richard Monroe, MD
25. Anders Grant, MD
26. Patti Lipschutz, PA
27. Aaron Lipschutz, PA
28. Eugene Bruckert, IL
29. Craig See, DE

pokey crawls out of swamp....

on hands and knees, barely breathin'...and reports disturbing phenomena. hitman went in with her on saturday morning, and has not been seen since. he apparently disappeared while taking a "main-drain" down at the water's edge. the fbi has NOT been notified, because of other "outstanding issues in virginia, florida, and the phillipines involving ranger rick, pink ribbons, coconut-covered marshmallows, and naked ladies." BIGGER PROBLEMS LURK ... pokey is reporting something slogging around in the slug-pond, and IT definitely "ain't" da'hitman. IT appears to be a large fish-monster of some sort, scaley and green, with large bug-eyes and a tail about eight feet long. this of course would explain the missing downstate delaware geese. regardless of all this "likely criminal behavior" the non-event will go on. pitiful sluggos will plod all day long, and finish the slug course. some will be lost forever in the forest, wandering out in the spring; looking ghoulish, distraught, and emaciated. and, likely; they'll have on the same black slug shirt, ripped, shorn, and hanging over a beatin' heart inside a bag of bones. friends ... this AIN'T pretty stuff ... please !!! for Goodness SAKES ... find something else to do on the first saturday in january. coming here for the SHIRT can lead to no good; DO NOT DO IT !!!! this is your last warning.... flatfoot freddie....

Ted Corbitt --- courtesy of Rich Innamorato

Dear Friends,

Today the music has died.........for the running community and for humanity.
Ted Corbitt has sadly passed away at the age of 88 at the MD Anderson Center
in Houston, TX. He bravely was fighting a personal battle against cancer,
but had developed heart and respiratory complications which could not be
cured.

I was able to visit Ted this past Sunday, Monday and Tuesday. It was
heartbreaking to see this giant of a man in a hospital bed. When he first
saw me, he amusingly asked, "You flew?" I am a notorious bad flyer, and Ted
had witnessed some of my previously anxieties. I responded, "Weren't you
glad that you weren't in the seat next to me."

I greatly thank you for all your heartfelt messages, and so did Ted. He was
not able to read them, so I read each one to him with a brief introduction
of the "writer" of each message. Your words were very comforting.

We all know his legendary feats as a runner, but he was even a far greater
person.

He was a humanitarian. One of his great gifts was not to prejudge people
just as he would not want to be prejudged. He accepted you for who you were
and allowed you to be yourself.

He was healer..... and dedicated his life to provide cure and comfort to the
critically disabled and injured. He was still treating patients just before
his latest illness.

He was a scholar. He had a great propensity to "learn" no matter the
subject matter. His own success, whether it was cerebral or physical, was
due to that desire to learn. And how he could apply the newly-found
information the next time.

He was a marvel. How he would push his limits no matter the obstacles.
Even as an octogenarian, he walked 303 miles in 6 days while enduring shin
splints. Life was a series of tests for him, and it was the partaking that
was the most important not the passing or failing.

He led by example every single day, and his character, dedication, kindness
and values all touched our lives. We are richer to know him or know of him.


May he always live in peace and be blessed by God. I will greatly miss him.

Love,

Rich Innamorato

ROCKSTAR checks in !!!

...ok all ya hardcore sluggo-fans. The ROCKSTAR (Honorary Slug allniteywoblius) has registered, and has promised a guest appearance..."to burn off a few brewskies." as many of ya know he is the founder, and race director, of the First States ONLY "One Hundred Mile-Run." while his 8 X 10 autographed glossies are currently going for $129.95 on e-bay; he's promised to make a dozen or so available at $75.00 flat-fee. of course, there's no tax in delaware. remember the ROCKSTAR only accepts "dollar bills," only goodness knows what he does with them. as always, John Clark and the Governor has been invited. More details coming!!!

don't mix insanity with beer....

...or you get these types of letters...

Forest Gump said...
As your newest victim it’s important to remember that I have been coerced into running this non event. I don't even like to run. Your slugger from last year AJ Johnson has guilted me into the event threatening to alert our entire community that I have become comfortable and accustomed to sloth. Consider the results of last event I was forced to participate in. I was found, suffering from heat exhaustion, aimlessly wandering a rest stop along the Garden State Parkway, mumbling incoherently with the juice of a BK Whopper dripping from my mouth. There is serious concern about my mental well being. This weekend when I told some friends about the non event they affectionately asked what my problem was. Consider yourselves fore warned. This weekend , after only four hours of sleep I was dragged out onto the muddy trails in South Seaville, NJ by AJ and forced to run under duress. I was not sure if puking was appropriate but around the 13th mile I was seriously considering lying down in the sand and taking a nap. I would have if I had not already begun suffering from the classic symptoms of hyperthermia. I will be doing my best to complete the coarse. I would suggest that all who attends bring an extra meal or reserve a room so that you are comfortable while waiting for me to limp across the finish. If you find me on the trail with my heel smacking me in the back of my head in complete agony just leave me there. Until then I'll continue preparing as best I can. Does anyone know if the local hospital accepts HORIZON PPO's?

pokey-slug on recon mission this saturday...

...as the fattest butt 50k creeps closer. pokey will be out scouting around, observing ranger rick movement throughout the slug forest. recent ice and snow has the trail mighty slickery. we sent wrong-way charlie out sunday morning, but haven't seen him since. best to keep a close eye on cnn, or fox news. he has a bad habit of climbing the fence at the white house. which, i don't mind; except when he's wearin' his slug shirt. see, i don't like those black helicopters hovering around my house. anywho, the days are flyin' by; and the field is nearly set. i expect to post full directions to this blog by the last week of december. that should give all victims plenty of time to change their minds. from the frozen tundra of central delaware...
flattest foot freddie.
p.s.direct all questions, comments, and threats to "teamslug1@comcast.net"

2007 SI Sportsman of Year...

while disappointed ole' flatfoot freddie wasn't named SI Sportsman of the Year...Team Slug congratulates Mr. Brett Favre!...a World-Famous Team Slug t-shirt is on it's way to Mr.Favre. Additionally, Mr. Favre is offered free lifetime entry into any Official Team Slug non-event. No doubt, he'd attend Fattest Butt; however, he's still playing with the Pack. And, what a season he's having! Good Luck ole buddy!!!

Need to be motivated; meet Mr.Hall....

tell me why you run everyday.....

Today I wandered back out onto the Super-Secret TSI training compound here in Central Delaware. It's really a beautiful area of this old world --- you may say, postcard perfect. Full of pines, hardwoods, and a serene pond; full of mirrored water. Critters jumping, running, and sounding off in their native tongues. On this cold mid-Atlantic morning, I encountered deer, squirrels, and a large red fox. The woodpeckers were out in force, staking their claims to corners of the forest; apparently unaware of my presence as they carried out their noisy duties. And, at such an early hour; not another human was seen. It's easy to think of this as a perfect place to run; the path blanketed with fallen leaves, winding around a quaint body of water; with perfect views at every bend. But....

...this is not what makes this part of the First State an inspirational place to train. Because there have been so many other parts of the country, and world; that I have loved to run in. What makes this place special is the same thing that made my thousands of miles on Noland Trail and Seashore State Park; or, my many thousands of miles in Blackwater State Forest special. Rather, it was the people I shared the times with.

As a runner, it's difficult not to remininse; no doubt, many of you understand exactly how i feel. Running is passionate, so alive; so breathtaking. Sharing it becomes intimate. We know each other at our best; and our worst. We've struggled together, and shared incredible joy together. Runners have been my best friends for over twenty years now. I like them.

And, today was one of those days when it all came back. For all the emotional distress, and pain, of the past several months; today was a good day. Recalling special friends and special times; and remembering that today i am exactly where i'm supposed to be. As are you. And we're all OK; doing the best that we can. Each morning when i look in the mirror, i say a prayer for each of you, and for me. That we may all keep our hearts open to giving and receiving love. If you're reading this, then you've made a difference in my life (or you will); and i appreciate you. That you can be sure of.

42 days till Fattest Butt '08

frost on the pumpkin's ; this mornin'....
details posted on this site by 12/15.

Dear Mr. Hitman,

After much discussion and coercion, I am officially throwing my name, as well my wife's name (Debbee), into the hat for the Fattest Butt 08 run. The snowshoes are ready, with sharpened edges to handle the steep glacial hills of Delaware. Ice axes will be out in an attempt to ward off the killer squirrels, but I only have 6000 feet of rope... Hopefully the global warming turns quickly so that it is cooler than last years jungle. I am also trying to recruit anyone else foolish enough from work to show up like Aggie Slug Leif did last year - so far there are no takers...

By the way, we saw your undercover arse at JFK, and ran into many other slugs out and about during the run.

Have a great Thanksgiving and Holiday season, and we will see you in January!

Talk to you later,

John Straub

p.s. dude; those hunter s. thompson sunglasses gotta go :)

Happy Thanksgiving Sluggos...

...and what a beautiful day it is. I stuck my "big bird" in the oven at six a.m. ; and was outside on the trails. wobbling along through the forest, smiling like a madman; just like the olde days. i am still fat; but i feel good, and i've been here before. i am on my way back; and life is good. cain't lie; '07 was a rough year, and i won't mind seein' it go; but, '08 is gonna be a great one, i can feel it.
today i am thankful for so much; my family, my health, and my friends. and, that includes each of you. time is precious; so if you're taking the time to read this; turn to your family and take the time to tell them how much you care. we are passing through; i promise you. the day is coming when we don't wake up; and it's o.k. ... so, let's make today count!
happy days, da' hitman

Threats, Lies, and Letters to the Editor...

Dearest Slug Brother!

Due to a slight lack in judgement (err. . .running JFK), I'm currently fiberglassed up to the left knee and in desperate need of some ginger brandy and cute nurses adorned with the rumored "TeamSlug Thong". Despite Pokey Slug's acute warnings, I ran the darned thing anyhow and managed to break my fibula around mile 15. As stubborn as I am, I decided to just try to beat it into submission (it worked when I twisted my ankle at the RBC 50K), but that apparently isn't a good thing to do when the bone is fractured. So, I hobbled along to mile 27, when our dear Pokey played the role of Florence Nightingale and came sprinting to my rescue.

Anyhow, I don't think I'll be up for running the January Fattest Butt. However, I wouldn't miss it for the world. I do intend to show up and egg the able bodied folk on in whatever capacity I can. In addition, I have had two lovely young ladies promise their attendance. Their names are:

Meredith Murphy--King of Prussia PA, and
Andrea Berninger--from somewhere in VA (warning, she's fast, and although this is her first ultra, i can almost guarantee we'll need to throw an extra loop in for her).

Hope all is well, and I hope you have a great Turkey Day!

Regards,

Down and Durty Slug


_________________________________________________



Dear Bro' Da Hitman,

Were you undercover at the JFK this past weekend? I did see Sistah Pokey Slug,
but didn't realize that you might have been there; and, stealthily leaving your snail trail around
and about.

Anyway, you might have learned that I did the distance once again in
slime time, just under the final cutoff at 11:47. It was a great day
out - and the evening was just as good, getting my fill of carbs,
protein, and alcohol at the Bavarian restaurant in Hagerstown.

Anyway, Sistah Pokey Slug took advantage of my disoriented state to
take some snaps of my sorry backside somewhere in the middle miles. (It
is irrelevant that I might have waved it at her in greeting, since my
hands were taken up with my canteen and a large handful of potato
chips!)

I hope that this gesture won't be taken amiss as I once again put my
hat in the ring (or my pseudopod on the line) for the event in January.
If I haven't compromised the customary standards of conduct of the
inveterate invertebrates, I would look forward to meeting you in January
at the usual rendezvous spot near a certain Delaware body of water.

For now, here's hoping that you add me to your roster (waiving the
character requirement) and have a nice Thanksgiving. Warm sluggish
regards to you and Sis PS, Bro' Sir Sweet Cheeks

Always calling me home....

What a perfect day at JFK. Nice temps, nice breeze; and tons of nice people. In fact, 1070 finishers; incredible! Recreational runners and serious athletes, olde friends, and friends that have moved on; people I've known for over twenty years; and people I've met at Slug events this year. What a beautiful life!
Running changes our perceptions of the world around us. It makes good times great; and makes the hard times acceptable. I've been struggling for so long; it's good to smile and laugh; and see those old familiar faces. Looking down through the finisher's roster is like a family reunion. And those olde familiar names bring joy to my heart. I am so happy for each of you. I understand the magnitude of the accomplishment; and cherish it, just like you. So tonight my friends; congratulations! I hope your holiday season is the best ever. From Team Slug, and The Hitman; happy days, flattest foot freddie.